News: American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 5

Boom! Down goes Covais! Down goes Covais!

OK, we feel a little bad for the twerp. Nerdlinger seemed like a happy li'l guy, y'know, despite his debilitating and shameful lithp.

But it's adult swim time, Radar, so use your scrawny chicken wings to haul your frame out of the pool and hit the bricks with the other zombies.

To all our Jesus-loving buddies, have a happy zombie-god day!

Also in this series...

• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 4
• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 3
• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 2
• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 1
• Killer Veep Vows Revenge, Guns Down Lawyer
• State Of The Union, With A Vengeance
• American Idol Uncensored: The Americanist Edition
• Can You Feel The Hate? American Idol Is Back
• Whoville Breeds Green-Glowing Pigs
• Pat Robertson Surprised At Fuss, Sets Record Straight
• Fall 2005 J.E.I. Interns
• The Least Litigious Place On Earth
• Cartoon World Mourns Death Of Jabberjaw
• Olympics & Pans
• Mississippi No Longer Burning, Itching Persists
• Get Away From Her, You Bi-yotch!
• Alba's Nipple Fulfills Red Carpet Duties
• Runaway Bride Pleads No Contessa To Felony
• Sit Down, American Idol, We Need To Talk
• Vatican Fast-Tracks John Paul II Sainthood, Issues Commemorative Cookie Jar
• Tough Break, Chekov
• You Was Robbed, Dawg
• Your Next American Idol
• And A Habemus Papam To You!

News: American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 4

At least the carnage has slowed to one sacrifice to the underworld god Khaine a week. And though we really want to see Kevin join his fellow American Losers as a member of the flesh-craving zombie horde, We'd have been happy with Bucky. Or Ace. Oh please dear lord take Ace.

Yes, Melissa forgot the words to her dull Stevie Wonder ditty (listening to the song picks, one would be tempted to, ahem... wonder why the man has such a following), and sure, her eyes are too close together, but dammit, she always sang better than we expected her to and she had a goofy charm.

Oh well, enjoy walking the earth as an unholy monster, kitten. Them's the breaks.

Best moment on this week's Idol? Taylor plopping down on the piano bench next to Stevie Wonder and offering a hearty "nice to see you!"

Also in this series...

• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 3
• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 2
• American Idol Of The Living Dead, Round 1
• Killer Veep Vows Revenge, Guns Down Lawyer
• State Of The Union, With A Vengeance
• American Idol Uncensored: The Americanist Edition
• Can You Feel The Hate? American Idol Is Back
• Whoville Breeds Green-Glowing Pigs
• Pat Robertson Surprised At Fuss, Sets Record Straight
• Fall 2005 J.E.I. Interns
• The Least Litigious Place On Earth
• Cartoon World Mourns Death Of Jabberjaw
• Olympics & Pans
• Mississippi No Longer Burning, Itching Persists
• Get Away From Her, You Bi-yotch!
• Alba's Nipple Fulfills Red Carpet Duties
• Runaway Bride Pleads No Contessa To Felony
• Sit Down, American Idol, We Need To Talk
• Vatican Fast-Tracks John Paul II Sainthood, Issues Commemorative Cookie Jar
• Tough Break, Chekov
• You Was Robbed, Dawg
• Your Next American Idol
• And A Habemus Papam To You!